If Everyone Knew
by poeticgrace
Summary: Secrets from Sacred Heart. ONE SHOT.


_**An Insecure Dr. Cox**_  
>If everyone knew how insecure I was, I would probably lose what little respect I manage to hold onto day to day in this damn place. It's really easy to come off as strong and confident when you're as good a doctor as I am, and on most days, I probably even buy it myself. And then I have days like that one a few years ago when I lost three patients in one shot, and all the false bravado kind of fades away thanks to the harsh lights of reality. It's a bitch, really, but it's the risk we take as doctors.<p>

_**A Shameful Carla**_  
>If everyone knew how I really felt about my daughter, I am pretty sure that they would hate me. I wanted to be a mother more than anything, and dealing with the postpartum after Izzy was born was the darkest period of my life. I never saw it coming, which is kind of a problem when you're supposed to be taking care of a baby. The truth is that she scares the hell out of me. I never thought that there could ever be something that mattered to me more than myself, but at the end of the day, Izzy is the most important thing I'll ever do. I just wish that I could be sure I'm not completely messing up my daughter.<p>

_**An Honest Janitor**_  
>If everyone knew just how much truth I put into my stories, they probably wouldn't find me half as amusing as they do now. Instead, I tell so many stories that I'm not really sure what the truth is anymore. It probably doesn't really matter much. I get to hide behind the guise of being a mysterious weirdo, and that suits me just fine. It keeps them scared of me, and that's a strangely powerful feeling to have when you're just the guy in the blue jumpsuit.<p>

_**A Reflective JD**_  
>If everyone knew just how much time I spend during an average shift daydreaming, they'd probably call the AMA and have my medical license revoked for irresponsible practice. Some things are just easier to get through if you can throw in just enough whimsy that it all feels fake. Maybe that's why I dreamt up that sitcom scenario with the Cheers writer. Life is a lot easier to swollow when it comes in a perfectly packaged twenty-two minute pill. Cue the theme music, Mr. Director, I'm ready for my close up.<p>

_**A Confused The Todd**_  
>If everyone knew just how confusing it is to be me every day, they might recoil so much when I give them an epic high five in the hallway just for rocking some asset-enhancing scrubs. So I like to rock the banana hammock, it's freeing to let the boys get some air. Besides, getting that tiny armoire custom made cost me two weeks' pay, especially with the special spot lighting I had the guy put in. It's not my fault that this trait attracts a certain kind of guy. I still like women. I'm just confused why people still question that.<p>

_**A Resilient Elliot**_  
>If everyone knew what it really means to be a Reid, they might not make fun of my so-called privileged upbringing quite so much. Everything comes with a price in my family, and nothing was ever handed to me without expectations. I thought I had finally broken free of that when I refused to accept my father's money anymore during that first year or two at college. I have JD now, so it shouldn't really matter. But it will always matter because there are some things you just can't escape. I'll always be a Reid, and I will always pay that price.<p>

_**A Secretly Sensitive Jordan**_  
>If everyone knew just how much I loved my husband, they'd probably see right through our witty banter. It keeps it hot to pretend that we don't really like each other, but the truth is that there is no one in the world that I need more than Perry. It's been seven years since I lost my brother, and no one other than my parents remember that day anymore. But Perry always hugs me a little longer and talks a little softer when I'm still reeling from my hangover in the morning and well, it's nice to know that he still cares.<p>

_**A Brave Ted**_  
>If everyone knew about the time I stood up to my mother, maybe they would know that I don't always let everyone walk all over me. She insisted that I quit seeing the Gooch because she wasn't up to my standards, but I told my mother to roll back over to her side and go back to sleep. It wasn't easy finally standing up to her, but some things are worth it. Gooch is definitely worth it. She might be a little weird, but she can carry a tune and strum a mean ukulele. What other girl in the world can do that?<p>

_**A Still-Dead Rowdy**_  
>If everyone knew all the weird things I've seen over the years, I am pretty sure that the cops would be able to make at least a half-dozen arrests pretty easily. I've been hauled around from apartment to apartment, lost and found, washed and scrubbed, posed and personified. I've been privy to all the big moments, but I've also been privy to some pretty weird and random things. Stuff that I can't even say here because...yeah, we won't go there. Ruff.<p>

_**A Wishful Turk**_  
>If everyone knew how much I miss my best friend, I'm pretty sure that they would think I was gay. If I am being honest with myself, I'd realize that most people probably already think that because we talk twelve times a day and are a little clinger than what's normal and even have pet names that borderline on sweet nothings. But JD has been through everything with me and now that he's gone and I'm stuck with Carla, it kind of sucks not to have someone to share it all with. I should probably share it with my wife, but she usually just tells me to man up. I don't have to worry about that with JD. He doesn't have any room to call anyone on their manhood.<p> 


End file.
